Yeah, I have a pretty massive guilt complex. It's usually not that bad, but it adds a lot of stress.
For example, I'm feeling super guilty that I used so much paper and ink to print out stuff for Model United Nations tryouts when I know I probably won't use it again. Never mind the fact that I'll recycle the paper; I just feel like I've wasted money and energy. Plus the irony that I printed so much stuff out for the topic climate change.
My friend A.G. had a ridiculous 2-inch binder totally filled with paper, all one-sided, at my first Rutgers Model Congress conference back in freshman year. Our topic? Climate change. Guess who brought up the idea of deforestation? Oh, A.G., the hypocrisy.
I think my guilt complex is part of the reason why I'm always so stressed out, but it's also the reason for why I care so much about trying to help the world.
Some ridiculous things I feel guilty about:
- not liking someone back (I never thought I would say that; pfft who would like me?)
- not being available 24/7 for my friends (which is ridiculous, because I DO have my own life)
- losing contact with people (which isn't usually entirely my fault...)
- getting bad grades (okay this one makes SOME sense)
- complaining about people
- complaining in general
Wahahaha. This explains the massive knots in my shoulders.
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